I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
soo... how was my night?
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
