It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'm sobbing to NWA
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
