Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
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