I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
