And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
