I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
