She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
