She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize