Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
