too bad you live with your parents still
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
