I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
