Me too!
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
