I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
He keeps bees of course he's weird
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
