it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
