when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
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