i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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