Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Randomize
