Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
