Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Randomize
