have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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