Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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