She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
