That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
