would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
