I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
