I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
