office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
