i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Randomize
