just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Randomize
