this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
