Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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