dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
Randomize
