I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
It's like God shit irony all over that family
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
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