i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
