Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
When are your genitals available?
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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