Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Randomize
