yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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