This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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