Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
