that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
