the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I don't want my vagina anymore.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
