we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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