Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Randomize
