He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
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