Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
