theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize