I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
My pussy is not your playground.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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