i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
