some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
She told me I should be a condom model.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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