I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
